College football rootability index, week 5

The 1990s were a special time for all of us. Fat pants. Seinfeld jokes. Tamagotchi. Using Football gear with unspeakable patterns, like the blue gator scale golf shirts seen here. Ron Zook was indeed once a young man with a Lloyd Christmas butt cut hairdo and a demotion to special teams coordinator, headbutting players when they came off the field and leaping around like a toddler who'd gotten into a bag of candy. Look at the sheen of youth on the man! The come hither sultriness about the eyes, the cocky tilt of his posture. That's a man about to take life by the udders and make himself some smooth, silky success-butter.

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