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<blockquote data-quote="bmb777" data-source="post: 589220"><p>From the Washington Post Style Invitation:</p><p></p><p> It was postulated that English, like many foreign languages, should have male and female nouns. Readers were asked to assign a gender to a noun of their choice and explain their reason. Here are the best submissions:</p><p></p><p> ZIPLOC BAGS - Male, because they hold everything in, but you can always see right through them.</p><p></p><p> SWISS ARMY KNIFE - Male, because even though it appears useful for a wide variety of work, it spends most of its time just opening bottles.</p><p></p><p> KIDNEYS - Female, because they always go to the bathroom in pairs.</p><p></p><p> SHOE - Male, because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging out.</p><p></p><p> COPIER - Female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up. Also because it is an effective reproductive device when the right buttons are pushed and it can wreak havoc when the wrong buttons are pushed.</p><p></p><p> TIRE - Male, because it goes bald and often is over inflated.</p><p></p><p> HOT AIR BALLOON - Male, because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it... and, of course, there's the hot air part.</p><p></p><p> SPONGES - Female, because they are soft and squeezable and retain water.</p><p></p><p> WEB PAGE - Female, because it is always getting hit on.</p><p></p><p> SUBWAY - Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.</p><p></p><p> HOURGLASS - Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.</p><p></p><p> HAMMER - Male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.</p><p></p><p> REMOTE CONTROL - Female, (Ha! You thought I'd say male). But consider: it gives man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="bmb777, post: 589220"] From the Washington Post Style Invitation: It was postulated that English, like many foreign languages, should have male and female nouns. Readers were asked to assign a gender to a noun of their choice and explain their reason. Here are the best submissions: ZIPLOC BAGS - Male, because they hold everything in, but you can always see right through them. SWISS ARMY KNIFE - Male, because even though it appears useful for a wide variety of work, it spends most of its time just opening bottles. KIDNEYS - Female, because they always go to the bathroom in pairs. SHOE - Male, because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging out. COPIER - Female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up. Also because it is an effective reproductive device when the right buttons are pushed and it can wreak havoc when the wrong buttons are pushed. TIRE - Male, because it goes bald and often is over inflated. HOT AIR BALLOON - Male, because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it... and, of course, there's the hot air part. SPONGES - Female, because they are soft and squeezable and retain water. WEB PAGE - Female, because it is always getting hit on. SUBWAY - Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up. HOURGLASS - Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom. HAMMER - Male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around. REMOTE CONTROL - Female, (Ha! You thought I'd say male). But consider: it gives man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying. [/QUOTE]
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