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Old Jun 26, 2014, 05:19 PM   #1
cmore
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Hi, all. My wife (38) is 21 weeks pregnant. She took the "quad" test about a month ago and the results indicated that she was high risk for Downs. Considering her age, we weren't too shocked and her doctor didn't seem awfully concerned. He asked us if we wanted further testing done at Carle Hospital and my wife said "sure, why not". The real reason she wanted the further testing done was because her doctor didn't schedule another ultrasound until 32 weeks and we have yet to know the sex of the baby. Well, we just got back from the hospital with some worrisome news. When we got there, we were told that she had a 1/35 chance of having a DS baby according to the results of the Quad test. I was shocked and a little ticked off at her doctor for not letting us know how serious this was. Our family history is solid, with no known problems. We had the ultrasound and I was completely thrilled that we were having a boy. 10 minutes later another doctor came in and went through what he saw on the ultrasound. Everything looked great except two things. The baby's heart has a calcium deposit on it which doubles the risk (which he states is now 1/16). Also the baby has sandal toes. I guess it is a condition where the big toe is a little farther away from the next toe by a little more than normal. He said that sandal toes is not an official indicator though. Neither conditions will cause problems to the baby, but the doc said that many DS babies have these conditions. Has anyone ever dealt with this in the past? Any help/suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
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Old Jun 26, 2014, 07:03 PM   #2
riffraff
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All you can do is know that regardless this is your child and so you will love him or her unconditionally.
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Old Jun 26, 2014, 07:08 PM   #3
Bob Christiansen
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All you can do is know that regardless this is your child and so you will love him or her unconditionally.
X2...

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Old Jun 26, 2014, 07:10 PM   #4
CardsIllinifan8
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I know you'll love your son no matter what! But take it in stride because I would imagine every baby, no matter the condition, is different. Cmore, you got this.

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Old Jun 26, 2014, 08:24 PM   #5
DaytonIllini
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Really sorry to hear you are going through this. Keep in mind that neither thing you mentioned automatically means a problem. They can both be normal variants. I hope they are in your case.

My wife and I had slightly similar news (a markedly increased blood marker) 19 years ago. Fortunately aside from a sassy attitude and a predilection for PSU our daughter turned out fine. But we had to decide at the time whether to do an amniocentesis or not. We opted against it because in our case the risk of the procedure was higher than the risk of the baby having Down's. We also had decided to keep the baby regardless of the results. But that's an intensely personal decision. You probably ought to have a frank discussion about that with your spouse before determining which way to go. Should there turn out to be an abnormality, caring for a Down's child is a lifetime commitment and more. The toll in terms of time, emotions and finances can be quite large. It also means that when the parents pass, their other children will inherit that task. On the other hand babies with Down's can be remarkable gifts and there is a pretty broad variance of disability.

Whatever you decide, support each other, and know that you'll have people praying for your family.

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Old Jun 26, 2014, 08:33 PM   #6
cmore
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Thanks all for the replies. We are not doing an amnio. The risks are too high in my opinion. We opted for a blood test called maternity21. The results will come in a couple of long agonizing weeks.
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Old Jun 27, 2014, 09:41 AM   #7
Illiniaaron
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I hope everything works out the way you want it to. Remember prayer is powerful.
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Old Jun 27, 2014, 10:23 AM   #8
nicksmith4three
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I don't have direct experience with Down's. We had a positive screening for Cystic Fibrosis with my daughter after she was born. Off the top of my head, I don't remember the odds they gave us at the time. They were brutal weeks while we waited to get a sweat test to confirm if she had it or not. Thoughts that I would probably have to bury my daughter at some point. Fortunately, we found out that she is just a carrier and will never have it. No matter what, you will do everything you can possibly do for your child as a father and it will be rewarding like nothing else on earth.

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Old Jun 27, 2014, 12:07 PM   #9
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Thanks all for the replies. We are not doing an amnio. The risks are too high in my opinion. We opted for a blood test called maternity21. The results will come in a couple of long agonizing weeks.
These next few weeks will undoubtedly be difficult for you and your wife. I would encourage both of you to read "Another Season" by former Alabama football coach Gene Stallings while you await the results of the test. Regardless of what the test results show, you'll be moved by the book.
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Old Jun 27, 2014, 02:20 PM   #10
CHI 1086
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This board is at its best at times like this. Cmore, regardless of your predeliction, take heed on the words above, in cluding praying, (I will). and the comments above the love you will experience regardless of what the future holds. Best wisshes, prayers and please share your future with us. We support you.
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Old Jun 27, 2014, 07:06 PM   #11
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Praying for added strength cmore.

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Old Jul 3, 2014, 05:11 PM   #12
cmore
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I got the best news of my life today. We are having a perfectly healthy boy. I'm crying as I am typing this. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
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Old Jul 3, 2014, 06:05 PM   #13
illinicb
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Down Syndrome

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I got the best news of my life today. We are having a perfectly healthy boy. I'm crying as I am typing this. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

Congrats!!!!! As the father of two, nothing is like it.

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Old Jul 3, 2014, 10:54 PM   #14
DaytonIllini
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I got the best news of my life today. We are having a perfectly healthy boy. I'm crying as I am typing this. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
Prayers answered!

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Old Jul 11, 2014, 04:54 PM   #15
CHI 1086
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Cmore, I'm so happy for you. I have a small view into your recent emotional roller coaster ride. When my son was born, it was an emergency C-section and he was not breathing and was a 2 on his APGAR. They took him from the OR on a respirator and when they kicked me out to sew up my wife, I went in search of where he was. I was standing at the nurses station and they were calling the helicopter to move a "newborn Downs baby from room 6" Well, my wife was in operating room 6, but delivery room 5. The feeling was sickening, on several levels. You feel bad for the baby and angry at yourself for all our thoughts. It turned out to be the other child born next to us. My son is now over 6' 5" tall and in college. He is the pride of my life. Again, love them come what may.
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Old Jul 11, 2014, 05:57 PM   #16
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I got the best news of my life today. We are having a perfectly healthy boy. I'm crying as I am typing this. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
awesome news

but you would have been a great dad, regardless

I have a girl (24), boy (22) and boy (20). Everyday has not been easy, but I will say every year has been great.
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Old Jul 12, 2014, 02:35 PM   #17
Illiniaaron
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Wonderful news!
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