danielb927
Orange Krush Class of 2013
- Rochester, MN
Infer what you like. You are proving his point about an inability to discuss this case in isolation.
Virtue signaling is the constant bringing up of other victims and the broader problem of sexual violence - which is understood by all to be a bad thing, or at least should be. And if any here feel otherwise I doubt more posting on it will change their minds.
Let's discuss this case in this thread.
I do agree that we do not have all the facts here. Of those we have, I do not see the merit in charging him and seeing 95% of the country think TSJ raped this woman (notwithstanding Kansas's strict definition).
I appreciate your post, but I disagree with most of it.
Inferences are going to be made whether we like it or not. People are going to consider this case as part of the broader issue whether we like it or not. Dismissing those facts as a case of "infer what you like" is just burying your head in the sand. If I know my words will be interpreted in a certain way, I'm just as responsible for that meaning as I am for the meaning I primarily intended. This board is read by far more folks than write here, and we're largely responsible for what outsiders may think of Illini fandom if they drop by and read our posts.
Moreover, we all "infer what we like" about everything - if we didn't, communication would be easy. It's not a duality where some people take words literally and others don't - it's just that some people infer what you expect, and others don't. In fact, you're probably reading this and inferring that I'm incredibly biased and have an agenda (which I do, like everyone, although it's probably not the one you think).
So "discussing the case" in a levelheaded manner like your post - great. Discussing it in a careless way that will lead to avoidable misinterpretations (e.g. calling it "a joke") - why is that defense-worthy?
Lastly, what you call "virtue signaling" I would just call "contextualizing". In my view, "let's stick to this case" is no less a virtue (the one that you prefer) than "let's consider this in context".
Obviously we all think sexual violence is horrible, so it hurts when it feels like that's being questioned. But instead of going on the defensive with a loaded phrase like "virtue signaling", it's worth asking: is this person really saying I don't care, or is that just what I'm inferring? And if it is their actual meaning, what about my words might have given them that impression? Could I communicate more clearly next time?
The presumption of good faith is a two-way street — it's really hard to get it if we're not willing to give it. That means taking some ownership of miscommunications and inferences about our words.